It’s been more than a year since my last posting. And, much has happened since that last post. Since October ’09 I’ve landed a job that moved me to Virginia in the middle of the coldest winter I’ve ever known (but with lots of snow!), had the not-so-much coveted responsibility of paying for a replacement engine for my SUV, was in my first car wreck (not my fault), achieved my first toll road violation (also not my fault), and received my first speeding ticket (ok, that was my fault). I’ve also started graduate schooling, made new friends, conquered a few areas that were outside my comfort zone, have become considered “seniority” at my job, and have experienced the best vacation of my life thus far, which included travel, many friends, family, and Mickey Mouse!
I have so much for which to be thankful. My “end of the year” reflection and New Year’s resolutions are coming a bit late, but hey, who pays attention to those deadlines?! As I think back on all that has happened in the past year it makes my head spin. The past year has been an emotional one for sure. Lots of learning and growing up was forced upon this youngster (yes, I still claim youth). Definitely some regrets, and also certainly some decisions for which I’m glad. Through everything, it’s wonderful to realize that I have a Savior who is behind, in the midst of, and in front of it all. Although my focus can tend to be on the here and now, I have definitely seen the hand of God over my last 365+ days in Virginia.
This week, I’ve started another course in my graduate study. To say I’m intimidated would be an understatement. I’m scared out of my pants. My professor’s resume is in and of itself overwhelming. The class deals with all sorts of legal issues in the world of business. That is not the language I'm used to speaking. I’ll be stretching quite a bit in this course. Prayers are going up and nails are being bitten constantly.
To shift my monologuing (is that even a tense of the word?) more toward the New Year’s resolution…I ran across a quote that really jumped at me. I’d like to share it with you:
"Beware lest you lose the substance by grasping at the shadow." ~Aesop
As I briefly mentioned above, my focus can shift easily to the present and only the present. In addition, I have a gravitational pull toward worrying about situations and outcomes rather than throwing it all at the feet of the One who cares and is able. As I concern myself with situations, decisions, and the things and cares of life, I work out my own ideas of how to fix or plan everything while grasping to the idea that because I am God’s child, I have a special, implanted knowledge on how to run my life without always consulting Him first. Yes, I realize that is completely crazy. Believe me, I’ve come to the hard realization that it simply won’t do to have that mindset. Absolutely! I am God’s. And yes! I do want to grow in wisdom and knowledge through Him and develop a sensitivity to His will and way. However, I do NOT want to travel through life hanging on to that “shadow” of God rather than embracing the true Substance wholeheartedly and giving credit where credit is due. My mind is small. Christ’s mind is infinite—something I am incapable of understanding. Doesn’t it make sense that the Creator of all knows everything, has my best interest at heart, and is more than capable? This year, I resolve to dig my roots deep in Him, trust Him more, rely of Him fully, consult Him with EVERYthing.
God, guide my footsteps and make my path clear. Amen.
2 comments:
Hey. Glad to see God working in your life. He has been working in mine as well. And I was in the same situation...trying to do things myself without consulting God first. I've realized that I cannot. So, I have finally been able to surrender completely to the will of God and things have been much better. Glad to read your blog! Take care and make 2011 a great one!
Great to hear it, man. Hope you're doing well.
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